One of the scariest thoughts I think people who have experienced the loss of a child has is forgetting. Like I have been told so many times by others who have lost children, you never forget. Several of my friends who have lost children through miscarriage, being born too soon and early infant death have told me over and over, you never forget, no matter how many years go by you will always remember.
One day one of the girls in the EA group told me she had thought about maybe the reason I was having so much trouble accepting Kate's death is because I was scared I would forget......I really thought about that and realized maybe she was right. Now, don't get me wrong, she was in no way pushing me to the acceptance stage because anyone who has walked in our shoes knows there is no way you can force a person into the different stages of grief....each person has to go through the loss at their own pace.
I am very blessed to have friends who will never forget Kate or the little girl we lost through miscarriage. They remember the special days and ackowledge that we do have other children. They are not scared to bring either one of them up in a conversation......and for someone who has lost a child that means more than words could ever say.
I have learned you never forget. This baby will never replace Kate or her baby sister. Those two little girls will always be a part of mine and Keith's life. This baby will know about her two sisters....that is something that will be mentioned quite often in our home. If you are reading this and have never experienced a loss of your own you may be thinking that is a little different....I do not think it is different at all. I think it is perfectly normal. I have friends who have raised their own kids the same way, knowing about the siblings who have gone to heaven before them....visiting the gravesite like that is something everyone does.....yes, this little one will know about his/her two big sisters.
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