Well, this will be my first weekly Pregnancy After Loss post. I really like going in chronological order of how things happen so I will do that as much as possible but from time to time it may not be in chronological order.....
Finding out you are pregnant again can bring on a whole range of emotions. For us, we were excited, nervous, anxious and the list goes on. As I have learned through the years normally some people get a "sigh of relief" when they get past the point of where they lost the last child.
We found out we were pregnant in August of 2008 and then on September 15th of 2008 which is Kate's birthday we found out that we were most likely losing the baby. Our hearts were broken. Not only was it already one of the hardest days of our lives but now we found out that we still were not going to be bringing another baby home from the hospital.
When we found out that I was pregnant again it was even different than from the time before. This time I had experienced a miscarriage so for the first 8 weeks of my pregnancy I was very, very nervous. Every little thing that did not seem right I was discussing with my doctor. I enjoyed the morning sickness because in my mind it was a sign the pregnancy was thriving. Although we had some scary moments around 7- 8 weeks or so we made it through and went to our sonogram to hear 1 healthy heart beat. Although we got past the 8 week point we still have not gotten our "sigh of relief" because I carried Kate full term and it was a very healthy pregnancy and we did not know anything was wrong until the delivery.
For any of you reading this that has gone through or is going through a pregnancy after a loss know what I am talking about and for those of you that may have a friend or family member going through a pregnancy after a loss may wonder why the person does not seem to be just jumping up and down in excitement all the time. I know that all women are different and we all handle things different ways but I would say just give that person the space they need. One of the worst things I think you can say if you have never experienced a loss is "you worry too much". I know that my doctors have told me that they can't tell me "not too worry" because I have been through way too much to not worry.
3 comments:
You know I totally understand this!! You are going to be fine and I can't wait to come to the hospital IN A FEW WEEKS! and share your joy over a healthy baby!
Amanda, I was hoping that you could elaborate on this. wink wink;) I completely understand this. I also found it hard to hear that I just needed to relax and not worry. As if that was even possible.
Hey Emily, I will try and elaborate more from now on!!! Glad you were able to make it the other night....it was great getting to chat with you.
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